There are times I couldn't help but remember the past, and feel the emotions that came with reminiscing. I wanted so bad to go back to comfort my old self, who was in dire need of someone to draw strength from; to tell myself to not worry, to not fear, to not be sad, for he was never alone, especially during the times he felt like he was..and wanted to give up; to console him and assure him that everything will be alright; to make him realize God has never left his side. I knew I needed to apologize.
"I am sorry." I know I could no longer tell this to my old self. What I could do, though, is tell this to myself now. And so, I am sorry.
Looking back, I get overwhelmed with all the changes that have occurred so definitely, much like an execution of a meticulous plan, which is now in that stage when the promised 'someday' in the phrase 'someday it's gonna make sense' is slowly being revealed. Lord, please know that my heart is filled with gratitude.
And I know you have plans for me - and for all of us, your children - that only You know. The roads ahead are daunting, but, this time, I'll face them right: without fear, not lonely, with conviction, full of hope, and, most of all, faithful, for I know that in all I do, in all I will face, you, Lord God, are my shepherd and you will give me strength.
Changes are bound to happen. In 2 weeks, I will move to Cebu for a work assignment, which means I shall bid goodbye to the kind of work life I have known the past 2 years handling Robinsons, and I shall get used to living at a distance from my family and friends. With only a single life to live, I promise myself to welcome these changes with open arms, with conviction of the things unknown and unseen, because, more than ever, now I am certain that not only am I not alone, but also the Lord God is with me, as He is with every one of us whom He loves unfailingly.
"For we live by faith, not by sight." (2 Corinthians 5:7 NIV)
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